7th May

Just 1 year ago today He was diagnosed and it’s already been 7 months since He’s been gone.  I don’t think I will ever get over, or accept the speed at which cancer can take a young, fit and beautiful man in a matter of months.  It’s an impossible truth that I don’t want to believe, don’t want to be real, don’t want to be ours.  I’ve been dreading today, this anniversary, when 1 year ago today, life changed forever.  I owe it to my man, to keep on fighting, keep on dreaming and keep on living.  To lead a life he would be proud of me for and be the best version of myself, that he taught me to strive for. To keep looking forwards, even though every part of my being is tugged to that day, in some attempt to process the impossible.  I know tomorrow is never promised, but tomorrow I will fight again.  Today, I lament our fate.